The Soapbox - The Modern Man, or Time for a “Menaissance”
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It seems that by large in our society, feminist-related issues get all the attention. Turn on the television or open any modern news magazine or newspaper and you’re bound to find reports that cite statistics of how women are abused or how salaries in the workplace are not yet equal between men and women; articles describing eating disorders and how the media adversely affects women’s body images and so on. In my own personal experience and that of many of my peers, whenever I’ve heard someone speak or write about topics like these, their tone regarding men has always been somewhat anti-male. Men are collectively vilified in numerous ways and it has been happening for so long now that this attitude has become somewhat institutionalized and acceptable to in our society.
Men are often pigeonholed into several categories, often being a combination of brutes, misogynists, or adolescent men-children. All of these are uncouth and reprehensible, and perhaps all these criticisms are not undeserved. However, these presently institutionalized definitions of what a male is in modern society fall vastly short of what it means to be a man, and leave the male population in the US depressed, listless, frustrated, and without a direction.
Let me be clear, I’m not saying this to downplay the importance of women’s issues. Many women have been treated unfairly throughout their lives in all regions of the globe, in all sorts of horrible ways. There are still wrongs that need to be righted when it comes to matters of human dignity among females, but that is beyond the scope of the essay.
The focus of this essay is on men and their increasingly marginalized role in society. An interesting study that was recently published by Ronald C. Kessler, Ph.D., conducted with the National Comorbidity Survey, who’s tests were later repeated and verified by the World Health Organization with funding from the National Institute of Mental Health, rocked the psychiatric world. The study’s results flew directly in the face of one of the pillars of modern-day psychiatry, that being that twice as many women experience depression than men; a commonly cited and well-known statistic. The results of the tests contended that modern psychiatric diagnostic methods simply didn’t account for the ways depression manifested itself in men, which tend to be vastly wilder than the kind of clinically recorded and widely recognized symptoms females report. Instead of the classic symptoms such as sadness and fatigue among others outlined in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, men tended to get angry. The way this anger was dealt with came in a variety of forms included all sorts of vigorous activity spanning as long as years; things like marathon training. If the anger turned into a deep-enough depression, violent suicide often occurred. So we see men’s mental needs largely ignored or misunderstood, leading to either misdiagnosis or complete denial that any real problem exists, thus automatically forgoing any and all treatment possibilities. The study went on to cite that there are four times as many male suicides as there are female suicides, further illustrating the lack of understanding modern psychology has when it relates to men.
Similarly, education has become tailored to the success of females as well. A report in BBC News cites that in 43 separate developed nations, 15-year-old girls consistently test significantly better than boys in all areas of education. When it comes to literacy in the United States, girls are nearly thirty percent ahead of their male peers (Girls Top of the Class Worldwide). A report in USA Today reflects a similar condition. Despite the fact that there are nearly 15-million boys age 18-24 in the U.S. compared to the 14.2-million girls, university populations tend to be decisively female, citing a national average of having a fifty-seven percent female population. Obviously, boys’ capacity for learning hasn’t changed. Simply put, educational systems in the developed world encourage learning now for females more than males. The way boys traditionally and naturally learn is now discouraged against. Competition, something males thrive on, has been squelched in learning environments.
There is a common misconception that testosterone, the hormone, has only a minimal effect on aggression. While it is true that a simple hormone cannot affect a complex system of behavior in and of itself, what it can and does in fact do is affect receptors and their affinity for other chemicals in the brain, such a vasopressin. The result of the presence of testosterone in males provides for the expression of aggression by essentially blocking off the chemical shut-off switch (vasopressin) from the hypothalamus. The end result is a much greater increase in aggressive behavior. This kind of behavior is naturally harder to manage in a controlled environment such as a school, and therefore these natural tendencies are stifled and in the end; opportunities for learning are greatly underutilized. Once more, we now see that the education system no longer does much for the interests of men.
According to a U.S. Census Bureau report issued in 2005, median real wages for men are now falling faster than they are for women. Add that to a failing education system and a medical system that often underwrites or ignores any real issues men may have, and you don’t have a pretty picture. There has been a systematic institutionalization of this anti-male sentiment across our culture. An interesting commentary on this is found in the recently published book Self Made Man, by Norah Vincent. Vincent, a lesbian herself, decided to perform a social experiment and live as a man for eighteen months. After exploring all areas of manhood in our society, from social clubs to sexuality and everything in between, she came to this conclusion: “Men are suffering. They have different problems than women have, but they don’t have it better.”
There was an article featured on Craigslist.com from a while ago that was entitled Advice to Young Men from an Old Man. It was just a list of advice, but two items in particular stuck with me.
11. As a young man, you’re on your own. Society divides and conquers. Unlike women who have advocates looking out for them (NOW, Women’s Study Departments, government, non-profit organizations, political advocacy groups) almost no one is looking out for you…
29. Don’t believe the crap about the patriarchy. More women are accepted and attend college. More degrees are awarded to women than men. Women outlive men. More men commit suicide. Men are twice as likely to be victims of violence, including murder. If you consider sexual assaults in prisons, twice as many men are raped as women (society thinks prison rape is funny). The streets are littered with homeless men, sprinkled with a few homeless women. Statically, women are happier than men. The myth that girls are being cheated by are educational system is belied by the fact that schools are bastions of femininity, mostly run by and taught by women. Girls outperform boys in school. It is the boys in school getting ****ed over, and prescribed Ritalin for being boys. Real wages for men are falling, while real wages for women are rising. Just because someone says something enough times, doesn’t make it true. You have nothing to feel guilty about.
This article was widely read and very well received in general, appearing on numerous social aggregation sites and receiving many of hits. It doesn’t use the most eloquent language. It is brief and to the point and reflects a very real and raw attitude that men have about their newfound place in society. Many of the claims in the quoted article above I have attempted to elaborate upon and back up with credible evidence. The point is that there has been a sort of collective backlash at men over the years, manifesting itself in many forms. As a young man myself, I can honestly say that I do feel discriminated against at times, that there are assumptions made about me which are unwarranted and unfair and unfounded. I know that the majority of my male friends feel the same way. One thing that reaffirms this for me is modern media. If you look at things such as Fight Club, Braveheart, Gladiator, and more recently 300, you find that these tend to have hordes of loyal male fans always ready to sing their praises. It’s because these different pieces of media provide a sort of framework in which it is acceptable to express masculinity or a sort of masculine ideal, something modern society really doesn’t provide an opportunity for. Chuck Palahniuk, the author of Fight Club said that he wanted to provide for men what the Ya-Ya Sisterhood provided for women. Each of the aforementioned pieces of media revels in its testosterone-infused glory.
It’s easy to write off such things as exercises in violence so common to American culture. But to do so would be to ignore what I feel is a blatant manifestation symptomatic of this culture we have created whereby male virtues are no longer extolled but viciously oppressed in way that are fundamentally damaging to the development of the male population. I hope that people will come to see this as a problem and that awareness will be raised and something will be done about it. Otherwise, there will be a large population of disaffected and angry young men that someone is going to have to deal with.
But where does that leave us, men? We can either choose to lay down and die, willfully accepting the roles placed upon us by outside sources, or we can refuse to accept the lower expectations that others are placing on us these days, coming to a greater understanding of ourselves and how God made us to be men. (Indeed, I say God because in my experience, I find no fundamental universal basis for morality outside of God - something that is outside the scope of this article.) Perhaps we have not always sought the best from ourselves, and in lowering our own expectations we’ve lowered those of the people around us. However, when we have a complete picture and understanding and mastery of ourselves, we will be able to shake and move and shock the world in unheard of ways. To this I say, let the “Menaissance” begin.
Sources
- “Advice to Young Men from an Old Man.” 15 Feb 2007. http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/sfo/279126743.html
- “Girls Top of the Class Worldwide.” 16 Sept 2003. http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/education/3110594.st
- Berkstein, Jared & Mishel, Lawrence. “Weak Recovery Claims New Victims: Worker’s Wages.” 5 Feb 2004. http://www.epinet.org/content.cfm/issuebriefs_ib196
- DeNavas-Walt, Carmen, Proctor, Bernadette D., & Lee, Cheryl Hill. “Income, Poverty, and Health Insurance Coverage in the United States 2005.” Aug 2006. http://www.census.gov/prod/2006pubs/p60-231.pdf
- Delville, Y. “Testosterone facilitates aggression by modulating vasopressin receptors in the hypothalamus.” http://cat.inist.fr/?aModele=afficheN&cpsidt=2553272
- Gonzales, Laurence. “Exercising Your Demons.” Men’s Health. March 2007. http://www.menshealth.com/cda/article.do?site=MensHealth&channel=health&category=other.diseases.ailments&conitem=03a9b1774a5e0110VgnVCM20000012281eac____
- Marklein, Mary Beth. “College Gender Gap Widens: 57% are Women.” 19 Oct 2005. http://www.usatoday.com/news/education/2005-10-19-male-college-cover_x.htm
- “A Self-Made Man.” 6 March 2007. http://abcnews.go.com/2020/Entertainment/story?id=2928386
- Think Progress. “New Census Report: Uninsured Up, Real Income Down For Men and Women, Poverty Unchanged.” 29 August 2006. http://thinkprogress.org/2006/08/29/new-census-numbers/
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Comments
Bob Cornero Hey A Man, just wanted to address your comment.
We’re a small blog here, and as I said on the first Soapbox Editorial feature, we are opinionated and from time to time you may find that you may not agree with us. That’s fine. We’re just offering up our opinions and we can’t ask people to agree with us 100% on everything.
That being said, don’t throw the proverbial baby out with the bathwater. We run a creative and thought provoking site, and encourage thoughtful debate and commentary, learning and education, as well as fun diversions. We’ve made an effort here to present some opinions backed with stats and numbers and facts, and hopefully elaborate thoughtfully on the subject. If you disagree with us, please do so in a mannered way. We’d actually love to discuss things with you!
The goal of this article was to take a look at the modern world as a young man (myself) sees it. Indeed, who is more qualified than one with an insider’s perspective? I’ve done plenty of research with raw data to back up my many statements.
I don’t ask for any help from anyone in the article. I merely am calling attention to some issues, elaborating how the current system in many ways is not friendly to men. The article was also not intended to put down women in any way either. The have a whole host of issues they deal with; however as I am not a woman, I don’t feel I have a very authoritative take on that.
The goal with this article was to raise awareness and set a course of action for young men everywhere. Discipline, honor, intelligence, creativity, and kindness are all admirable qualities as well as possible solutions to the problems modern day young men face. We hope we act accordingly on this site towards our visitors, and we hope that we can carry on a great dialog in the future.
All the Best
-Bob
A man If you’re interesting in proposing an equivalence between men and women’s issues or in denying the reality of patriarchy, you are in fact contributing to patriarchy. I wonder how familiar you are with the broader shape of this debate (among men), with Robert Jenson on one end and guys like this on the other.
Here’s a working definition of MRA, courtesy of one Twisty Faster:
MRAs are patriarchy-deniers. The ideologies of this violent and knobbish subset of the Male Dominion spring from male fear of women’s personal sovereignty, and manifest in practice as active misogyny. Men suffer, O how they suffer, at the hands of subhuman conniving bitches who seek world domination through insane women-are-human propaganda and the misguided attempt to claim their own internal organs as private property. The MRA imagines that women’s interests control and abuse him in an ever more feminized world; he erroneously sees himself as a battered victim of women’s agency, rather than what he actually is: a moron.
Bob Cornero Your book looks very interesting… I might have to add it to my reading list. But I think you misunderstand me; I’m not trying to advocate a new patriarchy or disregard its past sins. Contrary to that, I’d like to see men actually man up and behave in ways that are ultimately beneficial to all of society, young and old, male and female. Again, let me restate that the men who are guilty of crimes should be held accountable.
As I noted in the article, not all of the criticism men receive is without just cause. One thing I particularly despise among my peers is the disgusting fratboy mentality - one that often degrades women. Again, let me restate that I think many women’s issues are valuable and completely 100% valid. I agree with them on many issues. And just because I think both men’s and women’s issues both exist, it doesn’t mean that I am trying to make the two equivalent. In the same breath, I’m not going to deny both stances validity.
I feel that to ignore the present reality that many of our institutions are geared with an anti-male bias is irresponsible. It’s a reality that men have to deal with in this age, and it’s present in our media, our educational systems, our criminal justice systems, and our medical systems - I gave raw stats for this. I guess the heart of the article is getting at how are males going to learn to behave as men ad they grow older. Do they just stay males, or are they taught how to behave like men; gentlemen, even?
Don’t get me wrong - I’m not trying to justify all male action everywhere on the planet, touting their virtues simply because they have a penis between their legs. That is utter foolishness, and I absolutely would not take that stance. Many actions by many men are utterly wrong and continue to be so. But we currently have a large portion of the population who is listless and without a direction, discouraged by everything they see around them, all of whom (at least that I’m addressing in this article) happen to be male. I’d like to see those men become movers and shakers for positive things in the world; fighting diseases, helping bring economic stability to unstable regions, standing up for the right things. And honestly, what’s wrong with men becoming educated, well-mannered, and powerful if they are benefiting everyone and making a positive impact on society?
More to the point; this article isn’t about blaming anyone. It’s about understanding a system and learning how to navigate it successfully. Please understand, I’m not part of the Men’s Rights Activist movement; my intention is not to support any misogynistic arguments in this article. Again, women’s issues are very important and have their place in discussion. I love seeing women succeed and help others - but again, not simply because they are women but because I believe that all human beings are dignified creatures made in the image of God. But as it stands, I am a man; I have firsthand experience in this field, and with it, some authority to speak on it. I cannot speak with the same kind of authority on women’s issues because I am not a woman. I hope this clarifies some of my positions for you.
But (and I’m serious about this) I think I might have to look at your book - it seems very interesting. Thanks for the suggestion!
-Bob
Bob Cornero P.S. And that’s really what I’m getting at - that all human beings are valuable, both male and female, and deserve to be treated as such. To speak about one is not to deny the important of the other.
Thanks for reading all this. I really do appreciate your time and energy. Hopefully you find our posts more enjoyable in the future! The Soapbox is an editorial section that comes around I’d say once a month (so far) - the rest of the time we enjoy exploring art, free (and legal) music that you can download, fascinating videos about advancements in science and technology, and tips about healthy living, as well as reveling in this big mix we call the internet. We love it, and we love interacting with our readers, and I sincerely hope you find something you enjoy on the site, as there is a lot to see here!
All the best,
-Bob
A man Please do, although I should say it doesn’t completely represent my personal views. One thing: I would encourage you not to think of patriarchy as a thing of the past. Twisty’s blog (linked above) is actually a pretty entertaining, vibrantly written account of its ongoing exploits. Keep your mind open and take a look at it sometime, too.
Bob Cornero Awesome! I’m really going to have to obtain that book now. And I understand; I didn’t mean to imply that I thought of the patriarchy as something of the past. I should have written that more clearly, but ces’t la vie. Thanks for everything! Hope you come back!
Soo It’s good to know other people are aware of this and are writing about it too. As men, IMHO we haven’t made very much progress in the past several decades, and in some ways we’ve even gone backwards. There’s so much bullshit on TV and in the movies, in sitcoms and romantic comedies, where men are taught weak and unmasculine behaviors and roles. This is harmful because sometimes men don’t have any real rolemodels to learn from, and accept any definition of manliness, no matter how wrong it may be. Things really do need to change. I’m all for a Menaissance.
ps. I found this post through the manival on agoodhusband.net
Bob Cornero Thanks for the comment, Soo!
Yeah, one of the main reasons I wrote this was because I had this professor in college who would literally bash on men all day. I realize some guys deserve it, but many of her statements were unfounded and unfair. Not only that, but there are so many cultural negatives today, just like you alluded to; I guess I should call it the Men’s Magazine culture, where apparently the only things we care about are boobs, alcohol, video games, and cars.
I believe that is a negative stereotype and a poor substitute for real masculinity. Furthermore, I believe that many of these men who are trapped in this kind of adolescent man-child lifestyle would choose different if they were presented with an alternative.
One book I read on the subject is entitled “To Own a Dragon,” by Donald Miller. It’s his reflections on growing up without a father and his subsequent search for male role models, as well as dealing with his struggles with God. It’s a short read and particularly funny and endearing; you can watch the the author read an excerpt and then talk about the book here:
http://www.mumbojumbodaily.com/donald-miller-point-loma-writers-2006/
I’m also glad to see they liked the post enough to feature it, and glad that you liked it as well. Check out that video. I think it will help many men in their own personal menaissance.
Tyrfing Very nice and well-researched article, I bookmarked it right away.
However, I do have an issue with your - unfounded - claim that there is no morality without God. Although a minor point in connection with this article, please check out the following link:
Bob Cornero Glad you took some time and enjoyed the article, Tyrfing! I’m going to try to address your comment next…
Again, before I respond let me say that I feel this is largely outside the scope of this article. I could write books on this subject; in fact, there already are many books out there. Ravi Zacharias and his books, Can Man Live Without God, and The End of Reason are great on this subject.
Looking at your article, one thing becomes clear - that morality is looked at as simply the summation of rules, and obedience in accordance to them, mostly out of a superstitious fear that a big guy in the sky will squash you. No doubt many people do indeed believe this.
This is not what I believe, for I do not feel that any measure of good deeds will every pay for anyone’s way into heaven, nor do I feel it’s a good basis for society. (I believe in the doctrine of Sola Gratia) Sure, fear prevents people from doing things like robbing banks because they know they will get caught, and one can argue that this is a societal good. But this is not the fundamental question of morality. You see, I believe God looks at the hearts of people. Are we really moral if our hearts are in the wrong? God isn’t so much concerned with the way our actions turn out, because if he is omnipotent, then he is always in control. He is, however, more concerned about the state of our hearts.
So yes, atheists can conform to the mores in society. Same with most religions. But that, in the end, is just a herd mentality. We do live in a society (Well, I, being from the US, do) where everything is largely influenced by a Christian heritage, and I believe that people living here do benefit from that. For instance, on a human rights level, no one is persecuted for their faith in the US. In other countries, people are murdered for less, and according to the mores of society, those murderers are often moral people, if not heros.
But I am speaking in terms of absolutes versus societal mores. You article asserts, quite correctly, that “morality existed in fact long before it was defined or described in theory.” Indeed, I can’t deny this. Romans 2 states that “the requirements of the law are written on their hearts.” This leads me to believe that all people naturally have a sense of right and wrong, something your article argues. I, however, see this natural occurrence, as occurring naturally because of God, instead of naturally in the absence of him.
But this then is the conflict - atheists don’t believe in God, while I presuppose his existence see it to be integral in the world. I guess, besides religious experience (and I don’t mean violent shaking, spewing out garbled tongues and whatnot, but rather this sort of whisper, almost like I’m being blown in a certain direction by the will of God - William Wilberforce often speaks like this), I simply cannot see the meaning of existence without God, save for what pathetic superficial scraps we can salvage, accomplishments that boost our egos as we pursue our own desires and carnal lusts. Indeed, if there is no God, then we are free to pursue whatever we desire. But if there is a God, then we are accountable, and if there is a law, it is the standard by which we are judged.
To say that “I find no fundamental universal basis for morality outside of God” is not unfounded. It is simply “something that is outside the scope of this article.”
Anyways, I hope that clears some things up. It really is an issue that requires lots of explanation, and I am working on a book, believe it or not. Granted, it could be years before I finish it… Thanks again for reading, I and hope you return to find something you enjoy in the future!
P.S. Feel free to offer up any response; this is a forum for this kind of stuff.
Bob Cornero Ahh jeez, I hope that didn’t come off as preachy. I’m just really glad that you read and liked and even bookmarked the article. Really, for a struggling internet dweller, it’s fantastic, and I don’t mean that to be taken lightly.
Cheers!
-Bob
[...] Manival this week features the article “The Modern Man, or Time for a “Menaissance.” If you haven’t read it yet, you’re missing out! There have been nearly 500 [...]
Mjaybee Great post - sad some of the 70’s feminist new-age “men” have been defrosted and continue to recite their misandrist feminist programming.
Keep up the excellent, fact-based articles and when you’ve completely alienated both the misogynist MRAs and the men-hating feminists, you’ll know you’ve struck the right balance.
Mjaybee P.S., “Twisty’s” blog and Robert Jensen, as cited above are both sources of intense, sexist anti-male vitriol. I don’t see anything redeeming about either, and nor do any fair-minded men or women.
Bob Cornero Thanks for the comments and for reading Mjaybee! I’ll keep what you said in mind.
Cheers,
-Bob
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Oh how I love this article.
*manly flex*
I suggest everyone read this article. A fantastic social–and universal– commentary!